The Billionty-Oneth Geek: Older Than 8 Since 1991

Like many of you out there, I’ve started watching more hours of TV series/seasons than I have movies over the past few years.  As some say, it’s the golden era of television, with strong and impactful stories told across the long form medium that is television.  I’ve watched and caught up (and am still catching up in the case of Sopranos) on a number of great series the past few months, so I’m hoping to write a short little write up for each of those.  The good thing is because I’ve had so many shows on the backlog, it becomes easier to filter out the shit, as I can see others reviews and public reaction to these shows. I need to start somewhere, so I’m going to start with the best.  Ash vs Evil Dead .  This is the best show ever.  But I am biased.  Evil Dead 2 is my favourite movie and has been since 2001 (at the time, I was a late bloomer).  It is the perfect mix of horror and slapstick comedy.  The franchise solidified Bruce Cam...

Bone Tomahawk takes place in the 1890s in a small frontier town called Bright Hope.  After the arrival of a mysterious drifter, the town is stalked by shadowy, primitive Native American characters.  They murder a local farmhand and kidnap the drifter, the female doctor and a deputy.  The Sheriff is advised by a friendly Native American that the ones who conducted the kidnapping and murder are not considered true Native Americans.  They are primitive cave dwellers referred to as troglodytes, known for their savagery, barbarism and cannibalistic tendencies.  The Sheriff assembles a team including an elderly deputy, an itchy fingered gunslinger and a civilian townsman (husband of the kidnapped doctor) to track down the troglodytes and save the townsfolk.  Together, they head out to face the dangers of the wild where the chances of survival are fleeting. Bone Tomahawk is a perfect merger of the western and cannibal-horror genres.  Clocking at 1...

Knock, Knock is the latest effort from cult favourite director, Eli Roth.  It’s also the first outing by Keanu Reeves since 2014’s much lauded John Wick, an action packed fan favourite. Knock, Knock is about an architect named Evan Webber (Reeves); a happily married man with two kids.  On one particular weekend, the wife and kids go away to the beach house while Evan stays behind to catch up on work.  The first night is a stormy evening with what appears to be a torrential downpour.  That night, two unexpected young females show up at Evan’s door.  Drenched from head to toe, the buxom young lasses claim that they got lost looking for a house party in the neighbourhood.  Evan let’s them in to dry off and use his tablet to find the right address.  Due to the stormy night, it wouldn’t be 45 minutes until a cab arrives to pick them up.  And that provides 45 minutes for them to seduce him.  What seemed like fun and games the previous n...

Deathgasm is the latest Kiwi produced horror flick to hit stateside.  It tells the story of a group of teenaged metalheads (in a band called Deathgasm) who discover the ancient lyrics and staff music from a legendary yet reclusive metalhead named Rikki Daggers.  One evening during band practice, they perform the ancient music, metalcore style.  Unbeknownst to them, the music puts them into a trance like state inviting demons to possess all people nearby.  Death, blood and guts ensue as the demons ravage the quaint neighbourhood.  It’s up to Deathgasm to stop the demon takeover. Deathgasm is not good by any traditional or conventional sense.  However, if you’re heading into the movie knowing that it’s a horror movie about a bunch of teenage metalheads and demon possession, then you need not look further, because Deathgasm delivers on that front.  It’s a niche genre that the niche audience will enjoy; bystanders need not go further.  The ...

I know a lot of you out there feel the same way, but it's worth mentioning anyways, but the older we get, the less free time it feels we have.  And unfortunately, that's one of the reasons why my posts have been so sporadic, if not altogether non-existent.  I haven't had as much time to enjoy as much geekery as I've wanted to, and even less time to sit and write about them.  I really enjoy writing about geek related stuffs and actually a friend was asking me about my blog writing a month or so ago.  It encouraged me to dabble at it again.  As a friend once said to me, it’s that reflection and that dissection that graduates the medium to an art form.  And so it's a new initiative of mine to try and write at least one post a week about something... anything! If I had to choose one, I think the geekery that took the biggest hit has been movies.  I feel like with gaming, books, comics and TV shows, it's easy to fragment the medium into save poi...

Scream the TV Series .  What a shitfest!  And although I know why I decided to give the series a shot in the first place, I don’t know why I stuck through it all! Scream follows a bunch of white teenagers in the town of Lakewood as they explore and investigate the brutal murders of one of their friends, a popular and promiscuous girl from their highschool.  The murder sparks memories of the town’s sordid past, that of a previous murder spree conducted by a masked serial killer.  The killings and the style just seem too similar.  As the investigation continues, so does the body count.  Everyone from the jocks, the lesbian, the English teacher and the mayor (to name a few), are all suspects.  And behind one or more of those faces is the masked Lakewood killer. Scream the TV Series is the television successor to the slasher film series by the late Wes Craven.  Although the two share the same name and general plot structure (i.e. of ...

What a bizarre movie! Ms. 45 is an exploitation flick released originally in 1981.  It follows the life of Thana, a young, mute seamstress working in New York who is raped twice in a single day.  Traumatized by those events, she goes on a killing spree, randomly killing men with a .45 caliber gun.  Thus, Ms. 45 was born.  At first, she seems to have a motive – to dispatch any male person who would attempt to take advantage of her.  But later on, the motive becomes blurred, as she targets random men making out with their girlfriends, not related to or threatening Thana in any way.  In its bloody denouement, Thana dresses as a pistol wielding nun (don’t ask why, there are no answers) and goes on a shooting rampage at a club that her friends are attending. Ms. 45 is one of the first full length features by renowned director, Abel Ferrara ( Bad Lieutenant, King of New York ).  Much like his other movies, Ms. 45 goes for the gritty New York...

Goodnight Mommy is a Swedish horror/thriller that was originally released in 2014.  The movie follows two young twins as they spend their summer in the remote Swedish countryside.  They’re seen early on celebrating a summer full of innocent fun with laughter, sunshine and smiles.  One day, their mother returns home having gone through cosmetic surgery on her face.  Her face is bandaged beyond recognition.  Is she who she really says she is?  After some suspicious activity, the two boys begin to question her identity.  Is she someone that we can trust?  Alternatively, can the perspective from the boys be trusted? There’s not too much more I can say about the plot, as the story takes you for a few twists and turns as akin to horror movies.   I will say this though, that within 6 minutes of the movie, you could already tell what the major twist of the story will be.  And it’s mostly because it’s nothing that you haven’t alrea...

Evil Dead .  The beloved franchise.  Was a remake necessary? Evil Dead (remake) follows a bunch of 20-somethings as they gather at a cabin in the woods for a getaway weekend.  The getaway is not without purpose, for you see, Mia, one of the girls in the group is battling drug addiction, and it’s with hope that she would overcome her demons (!) surrounded by friends and ridding herself of the poison.  But they are not alone in the woods.  And when the group finds the dreaded Book of the Dead, conveniently located in the cabin, and reads aloud its sacred incantations, the woods become alive.  And then our friends become dead!  But then they become alive again!  EVIL DEAD!!! I didn’t like this movie. The movie incorporates elements from the original Evil Dead , but the spirit of Evil Dead wasn’t there.  Everything was slick.  In any other horror movie this would be fine, but I think as an “Evil Dead” movie, there’s a pedigree t...

Cabin in the Woods is not what you expect. I first heard about the movie when it played AICN’s Butt-Numb-A-Thon 2012, and adhered to the recommendations to avoid everything you can about Cabin in the Woods .  And rightly so as the fun with the movie is everything you don’t know about it.  So aside from seeing the trailer last year, I knew nothing of the movie.  And even then, I didn’t recall what was in the trailer, so as far as I was concerned, I went in fresh. On the outset, Cabin in the Woods is a straight-up horror movie, following five college students as they head to a countryside cottage for some R&R.  All the typical horror archetypes are represented: the jock, the sweet and innocent virgin, the slutty slut, the thoughtful and articulate smart guy (note: not nerd), and the pot smoking, comedic relief.  We also bounce between two laboratory technician characters who are monitoring the students for some mysterious reason.  Just...

Oh how the working life affects blogging. It's taken me a month to compile this post! It's not even holidays anymore. But hey, it's a holiday in my heart. Anyhow, this past Christmas break, I got to catch up on a slew of horror flicks that I missed this past year. None were really exceptional, as they ranged from terrible to okay. But regardless of, they made the holidays a bloody good time! Fright Night Of the 4 horror movies here, this one was probably the most polished. Fright Night is a remake of the 80’s classic of the same name. It follows a teenager and his young friend who suspect that their brooding, mysterious neighbor might be a vampire. Surprise! He is! I never would have thought much of Colin Farrell as a vampire, no less a villain, but he does a pretty darn good job here. The movie was enjoyable, definitely not as campy as the original, but enjoyable nonetheless. It’s a shame that this movie didn’t do so well at the box office. Has the vampire cra...

Troll Hunter is a mockumentary based on the troll hunting escapades in Norway. As such, it’s shot handicam style. The movie follows a group of university students filming a documentary about an elusive bear poacher in Norway. The students follow him despite his wishes to be left alone. One night they track him down to a forest outside of town, hoping to catch him in the act. The kids get more than they bargained for. Instead of catching him killing a bear, they find him being chased by a giant TROLL!!! It turns out he wasn’t a bear poacher at all, but a troll hunter! In an effort to cover up troll-related activity across the nation, the country has what’s called the Troll Security Service (or TSS), who act on reported sightings by killing off the destructive and giant-sized trolls. There is much humour, as the TSS makes public statements to the local press, pinning the blame for the damaged communities on bears, inserted onto the scene afterwards. The rest of the movie follow...

I was lucky enough to catch Lucky McKee’s The Woman at the 2011 Toronto Afterdark Film Festival. The Woman tells the story of the Cleek family. The Cleek’s are your run-of-the-mill suburban family; you’ve got the breadwinner father, the submissive mother, the tortured soul older daughter, the rebellious son and the innocent toddler. The father, Chris Cleek, who goes hunting one day, captures seemingly, his biggest hunt to date: a wild woman. He traps her, kidnaps her and takes her to his secluded ranch house. She is locked and chained away in his dungeon like shed. He is filled with joy as he shows his family his most prized finding. He doesn’t seem to comprehend the wrongness of his actions. Yet, his family doesn’t exactly share the same sort of joy and are filled with a sense of disbelief. However, they follow along with the mad father’s idea and reluctantly go along with the hi-jinks. Chris Cleek decides the whole thing is a family project, to domesticate and teach the ti...

So there's been a bit of controversy regarding the release of Hatchet II this last weekend. It was prematurely pulled from the screens on Sunday night. There's a few floating reasons as to why. Though the official word is due to the poor performance, many think it has to do with the "unrated" rating that the movie carries. It may be true, as AMC usually carries a handful of indie movies that don't generally do well. Here's the article: Just got word that Adam Green's Hatchet II has been pulled from U.S. theaters. This comes in the wake of Canada's decision over the weekend to similarly block the film from the theatrical circuit. I'm being told a "full press release" is coming tomorrow and I'm curious to see how they're going to spin this. The film opened in 68 theaters taking in an estimated $900 per screen grossing - around $60 thousand at the box office. It was playing without a rating at AMC theaters. The origina...

You know, I feel blessed living in Toronto. You see, for a limited time, Hatchet II is screening in select cities across the USA and Canada. The AMC theater in downtown Toronto is one of 2 theaters across Canada participating. Even though The Social Network and Let Me In were released (both to raving reviews), the chance to see a Hatchet movie on the big screen was an opportunity that I couldn't pass up. Hatchet II picks up immediately where the first one left off. The lone survivor, Marybeth (Danielle Harris), is fending off an angry and injured Victor Crowley in the swamps of Louisiana near New Orleans. Victor Crowley is of course the hatchet wielding killer — a deformed ogre-like hillbilly that lurks in the swamps. She frees herself from his clutches and makes her way back to New Orleans, to the shop of one Reverend Zombie (Tony Todd), the mysterious magician like shopkeeper that directed the previous group to Crowley in the first place. Marybeth, wanting revenge on Crowley...

From the opening scene of Piranha 3D , you know a statement is being made. They had the smarts to hire Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss, I believe is his civilian name) to play the opening kill — a staple in horror flicks. Yes, Hooper may have survived Jaws , but he certainly didn't survive Piranha 3D . And so the standards were raised after the first 5 minutes. And if that wasn't enough, the jabs really started when they released the poster (to the left) even before the first minute graced the screen. But obviously they weren't trying to top Jaws , a cinematic masterpiece all things considered. No, Alex Aja isn't that stupid being an esteemed director himself. Instead, he tries to take the spirit of the original Piranha and mix it up with an over-the-top flavouring, nearing Scary Movie -levels of ridiculousness. Thinking about it, this movie was akin to the B-movie qualities of Eight Legged Freaks , which was surprisingly decent. The movie takes place at a lake side town b...

... I'm still reeling in a bit from seeing it. It was altogether a very good movie (in the sense that Inception was also very good). Great? I'm not sure at the moment, but that could change soon. I watched it a few days ago and since then, I've thought a lot about it and I like the types of ethical questions they pose in regards to science. Mix that in with elements of sci-fi with horror and drama, and you get one unique film. Also to note, it was probably also one of the most disturbing movies I've ever seen. In Splice , we follow two scientists, Clive and Elsa (Adrien Brody and Sarah Polley), who successfully create a new species by splicing the DNAs from different animals together. The company who they are funded by wishes to take their research into a new direction and fearing that they would be relegated to mundane research, they start taking matters into their own hands by secretly conducting experiments: splicing animal with human DNA. The new creature they ...

Last month, the trailer for Let Me In was released. It's a remake of the Swedish movie Let the Right One In from 2007. The thing that really hit me when I saw this trailer was how similar looking it was to the original movie... like the frame-by-frame type of similarity. I think the movie is going for the type of remake in the vein of Gus Van Sant's Psycho (1998). Rather than adding their own spins on the movie, they stay loyal to the material in reproducing every scene. I'm not sure how I feel about these type of remakes. I mean, if you're going that route, why not just tell people to watch the original? But at least in this case, it's bringing an original story to a fresh new audience. I wasn't fully enamored with the original but I did enjoy it. We'll see how the reviews turn out for this one. Have a good weekend geeks!

I'm always skeptical of Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes' remakes/reboots of horror movies which seems to be all they live on. Frankly, they have produced a lot of crap, but they did make ones where for the most part I enjoyed ( Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake would be one, Friday the 13th would be another). I understand from a business standpoint why movie studios would make these, but from the perspective of a fanboy, it makes no sense. Why play with history? Why recreate the wheel? Now, I enjoyed the original Nightmare on Elm Street but I can't say that I was the hugest fan of the series. I was exposed to the series later on in life (during my teen years) whereas I was introduced to Friday the 13th at a more young and impressionable age. For that reason, Jason Voorhees was always a more lasting (and life scarring) figure than Freddy Krueger. The movie follows a bunch of teens as they unravel a mystery surrounding the grisly deaths of a group of teenagers in town. Th...