The Billionty-Oneth Geek: Older Than 8 Since 1991

The movie going public can sometimes be frustrating. We cry about the lack of originality and complain about the onslaught of prequels, sequels, spin-offs and what-have-you, yet when we’re finally given something new and original, we don’t go out and see it. And that’s exactly what happened with Source Code . Source Code , which received a whopping 90% on RT opened with a measly $14 million on its debut weekend (second only to Hop which did a ridiculous $37 mil despite being slammed all around). Which tells me one thing – our western nation is full of idiots. Moving on. Source Code follows Captain Colter Stevens (Jake Gyllenhaal) who wakes up one day on a train in front of a complete stranger. He has no idea what’s happened or how he got there and has no idea why this woman in front of him is calling him Sean. After a bout with confusion, he winds up in the washroom of the train. When he looks into the mirror, it’s not his own face he sees but the face of a man he doesn’t kno...

World Invasion: Battle L.A. Oh no. This was not a good movie. There isn’t very much to the story. The movie takes place in August 2011, when one day aliens decide to invade our world. As it goes, the aliens have pretty much taken all over all of the major cities on the west coast… all save for Los Angeles. The movie follows Staff Sergeant Nantz (Aaron Eckhart) and his platoon of grunts as they look for a way to save the city and any civilians that they come across. Battle L.A. is a lazy man’s Independence Day , without the fun or the tongue in cheek smarminess of Will Smith (awww hay-llll naw!). The story moves A to B without any feeling or emotion. What also hurts is the lack of a climax that is almost pivotal in big action blockbuster type movies. It lacks the sense of direness that one would associate with a world invasion. So the story doesn’t give you anything worth buying into and what’s worse is that they don’t give you any characters worth investing into either. Eve...

I love movies where the title describes what you’re going to get. Like Snakes on a Plane . Or Hot Tub Time Machine . There’s no ambiguity. Here you have a hobo. You give him a shotgun. Hobo With A Shotgun ! Of course!!! The math couldn’t get any simpler. Hobo With A Shotgun follows an unnamed hero/hobo as he lands in the town of Scumtown (or was it Fucktown?) after hopping from a train. Upon arrival, he quickly learns that the narcissistic Drake, along with his sons Slick and Ivan, run the town after witnessing a literal blood bath in the middle of the streets. The town is infested with drug, violence and heinous crime in general not unlike that of the Detroit depicted in Robocop 1 to 3 . The Hobo sees it all and watches with a sick sort of disbelief. What the fuck is wrong with this town? After saving a prostitute named Abby from Slick, Hobo experiences his first run-in with the corruption in the town. Abby befriends the Hobo, and it’s not long before he shares with her h...