Skip to main content

DTV Madness: The right side of THE WRONG SIDE OF TOWN!!!

In case you didn't know, I love bad movies. I hate bad bad movies but I love bad movies. For me, it's difficult to create a scale to weigh out movies that I like or don't. For example, I love good big budget movies but I HATE bad big budget movies. Yet at the same time, I love low budget direct-to-video movies, which in a lot of cases are worst than bad big budget movies, but their lower budget gives them an endearing quality of sorts. Are you confused yet? Let's put it this way, if you're a bad movie but you went straight to video, there's a better chance that I enjoyed you more than if you had made it to the big screen.

Which brings me to The Wrong Side of Town (the name of the movie and not the place of course). This was a bad movie, but I found it wildly entertaining. I think a large part of it is because it stars two major wrestlers and as a hardcore wrestling fan, it behooves me to enjoy this tripe. The poster on the left is a bit misleading though. It places Batista (real name David Bautista) in the center of the poster, occupying the largest area, which wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that he was only in two scenes. In actuality, the star of the movie is Rob Van Dam (if you're not familiar with him, his name is a play on Jean-Claude Van Damme because of his similar looks... and similar acting chops after seeing this).

In this movie, RVD and his wife head out with some neighbours to a highscale club for some dinner, dancing and fun. At the club, his wife gets hit on by an addict of sorts and while defending her, RVD accidentally kills him... well, he sort of kills himself. Shit turns shittier as it turns out that the addict was actually the brother of the club owner/crime lord. The crime lord puts a bounty on RVD's head, triggering waves and waves of local hoodlums and thungs after our would-be hero. The movie then becomes an epic tale of survival for two couples stranded on... THE WRONG SIDE OF TOWN!

They had me right at the start of the movie. The opening credit sequence that they used was pretty much something plucked out of a James Bond movie. No, there's no famous singer doing the opening song, but there definitely is a song AND there definitely are silhouettes of females doing provocative dancing. Come to think of it, you don't see that in movies much anymore, not the dancing women, but the songs. I think adding songs with lyrics to any movie instantly makes it classier.

Meathead Batista and JCVD-lookalike, RVD.

The acting is what you'd expect out of wrestlers. For me, even though he wasn't the main star of the movie, Batista was the clear standout. His acting was not only better than RVD's but it was better than any wrestlers in those craptacular WWE produced movies. RVD is quite an acrobatic and aerial wrestler but his weakest quality was always his talking and promos. Even though his acting is clearly bad, they try to minimize it by focusing on his action instead. So what the movie lacked in the acting department they made up for in the bad-ass department in the hiring of noted thespian and Grammy-nominated artist, Ja Rule. Unfortunately for Ja, he was only in one scene, and I'm sure the budget was all it could afford. But they make the best with what they were given and I definitely laughed the loudest during his scene.

So friends, I'm not ashamed to say that I had a good time with this movie. It had action, it had wrestlers, hell, it had Ja Rule. What more can a mortal man ask for! Good times were had. Later geeks!

Comments

j-yeezy said…
ja Rule!! Now I know where's he been! On the WRONG side of town! lol...

Popular posts from this blog

Mark Waid's IRREDEEMABLE (Issues #1-7)

(Note: be warned that this review is on the spoiler heavy side, so read at your own discretion if you don't want the story spoiled.) Since I was a teenager, I always had this dream that I would become a quirky movie director and I'd make a bunch of crappy little horror movies to start with, but that my first big movie would be this anti-superhero movie. I dreamed up of an Apocalypse Now -like movie using existing Marvel superheroes where Captain America would go mad, slaughtering the innocent and go into hiding somewhere 'up the river'. There would be a detective like character (possibly superhero) that would be after him, interviewing his former teammates to find out what made the all-American hero go mad. Imagine my surprise when I started reading Irredeemable . Although not exactly the story in my dreams, it's pretty close. I started reading the series this past weekend upon the glowing review that those geeks over at iFanboy put up a few weeks ago. As far a

DTV Madness: Jack Brooks - M.S. and Gingerdead Man 2

Okay, honestly, I think this will be the last DTV post for a while. One man can only take so much shit. I'm only human, I have feelings too. These two movies pushed my limit. I'm going to be in DTV-detox for the next month or so. Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer I thought that with a title like this, it couldn't fail. I thought that with a poster like they had, it couldn't fail. Then I realized something... I failed. I failed in thinking that this movie had any hope. I was expecting some fun horror, mixed with comedy in sort of a Buffy the Vampire Slayer kind of fashion with a bumbling hero and smart quips. I mean, with a title like Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer , was I wrong in expecting a variety of monsters get slayed as the title suggests? It didn't help much that the monsters looked uber cheesy. They looked like something right out of a Power Rangers episode. But to their credit, at least they stuck with practical make-up and effects rather than CG. The mo

Finally, the Xbox 360!!

So as I mentioned in a previous post, I received an Xbox 360 for Christmas from my dad. A great present it was! I've had 3 weeks to enjoy it so I guess I can give you my impressions of it now. First the controller. In truth, I haven't felt a controller this comfortable in my gaming life before. As a child who grew up on the 8-bit generation, with just a directional pad and 2 buttons, there was quite a learning curve getting used to using two analog sticks at the same time. You might say, "Hey Lam, how bout the PS2? You have that machine, and that has analog sticks". True, but of the twenty or so games I have for that, all of them used either only 1 analog stick, or allowed the option to switch on to the directional pad. Using 2 sticks at the same time was at first just uncomfortable. This made for all sorts of trouble as I was playing Gears of War . Luckily for me, I had computer controlled teammates that watched my back. I love the Media Center capabilities