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"Love, it's a m****r f****r, huh?"

Yes, "love, it's a mother fucker, huh?" as quoted from one of the 21st Century's greatest films, Old School. I had an interesting conversation the other day with my friend who's currently residing in Seattle. He and I are in somewhat of the same boat... we are both the same age, single, recent engineering grads, we're both asian, God-fearing, and on and on. However, our views on relationships represent two different standpoints, neither, of course which are right or wrong... just a difference in preference.

His standpoint seemed a bit pessimistic from my perspective. Basically his idea is to find a woman as quick as you can, or else we'll get old, and all the nice young ones will be snatched up. That situation would leave us old, lonely, and settling for just anyone. I don't disagree with him, I can see that happening (although maybe not for me). The part that made me laugh out was how he said if we get that feeling of butterflies, it's game over. I guess I don't take this perspective because I don't think it's hopeless as you get older. If you can maintain your sense of confidence, be an open, outgoing guy, then where you are in life doesn't matter. In fact, I'd say a benefit for years of working is that you can offer more security (side note: we had a guest pastor at our church a year or two ago that said that's the number one thing that a wife seeks... security. You can translate however you want).

My standpoint is a bit different. Right now, I'm quite happy in my life. I've finished university, I'm not tied down to anything, and I'm entering the young career-adulthood stage. Basically, I feel there's a lot of freedom and I'm enjoying the geek life right now. I don't want to complicate that by getting involved with a girl. I want to enjoy the next few years without thinking about that sort of stuff, and maybe after a while, settle down more seriously. My friend Matt said to me not long ago, "but you can enjoy all these things, and have a girlfriend at the same time." That may be true, I can't deny it, but maybe my problem is that I can't envision it... all I can imagine is having an argument over whether we should watch Friday the 13th Part IV or the inferior Part VIII. It's an argument I'd rather save for another day, and therefore, she can wait.

However, having said all that, I understand that there are uncontrollable circumstances that can trump everything I've said. If I were to unintentionally meet a nice girl in the next while that I fancy, then it changes everything. But right now, I'm not actively seeking someone like my friend is, so if something were to occur, like everything else, it would be under God's influence.

Anyhow, back to some gaming. I promise the next post will be geekier. Later geeks.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Hey Jeff! Still liking the new layout.

But yeah I would definitely say you never what will happen, and if you happen to meet a nice girl (unintentionally of course) then embrace it! But I do lots of men who feel the way your friend does in Seattle but I agree more with what you are saying.

Hope to see you soon!
Beka said…
I think that's a great place to be in. What I learned is love kinda just happens. I definitely wasn't looking for it, actually I was quite stubborn and adamant about NOT looking for it. And then it happened. And when it does, whenever it is, you'll be ready for it even if you thought you weren't. You can never be ready for love. And that's what I think is so beautiful about it. There are no rules or formulas. It just "is".

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